03. June 2016 · Comments Off on Give and Take by Adam Grant · Categories: Uncategorized


My favorite quotes from Give and Take by Adam Grant

Page 50, “The dormant ties provided more novel information than the current contacts. Over the past few years, while they were out of touch, they had been exposed to new ideas and perspectives. The current contacts were more likely to share the knowledge base and viewpoint that the executives already possessed.”

Page 51, “Dormant ties offer the access to novel information that weak ties afford, but without the discomfort. Dormant ties are the neglected value in our networks, and givers have a distinctive edge over takers and matchers in unlocking this value.”

Page 52, “According to networking experts, reconnecting is a totally different experience for givers, especially in a wired world. Givers have a track record of generously sharing their knowledge, teaching us their skills, and helping us find jobs without worrying what’s in it for them, so we’re glad to help them when they get back in touch with us.”
Page 74, “This is a defining feature of how givers collaborate: they take on the tasks that are in the group’s best interest, not necessarily their own personal interests.”

Page 101, “Because they tend to be trusting and optimistic about other people’s intentions, in their roles as leaders, managers, and mentors, givers are inclined to see the potential in everyone.”

Page 105, “In roles as leaders and mentors, givers resist the temptation to search for talent first. By recognizing that anyone can be a bloomer, givers focus their attention on motivation.”

Page 106, “Of course, natural talent also matters, but once you have a pool of candidates above the threshold of necessary potential, grit is a major factor that predicts how close they get to achieving their potential. This is why givers focus on gritty people: it’s where givers have the greatest return on their investment, the most meaningful and lasting impact.”

Page 114, “Other studies show that people actually make more accurate and creative decisions when they’re choosing on behalf of others than themselves.”

Page 116, “Givers focus more on the interpersonal and organizational consequences of their decisions, accepting a blow to their pride and reputations in the short term in order to make better choices in the long term.”

Page 119, “In my own research, I’ve found that because of their dedication to others, givers are willing to work harder and longer than takers and matchers. Even when practice is no longer enjoyable, givers continue exerting effort out of a sense of responsibility to their team.”

Page 121, “Whereas takers often strive to be the smartest people in the room, givers are more receptive to expertise from others, even if it challenges their own beliefs.”

Page 131, “Because they value the perspectives and interests of others, givers are more inclined toward asking questions than offering answers, talking tentatively than boldly, admitting their weaknesses than displaying their strengths, and seeking advice than imposing their views on others.”

Page 133, “Takers tend to worry about revealing weaknesses will compromise their dominance and authority. Givers are much more comfortable expressing vulnerability: they’re interested in helping others, not gaining power over them, so they’re not afraid of exposing chinks in their armor. By making themselves vulnerable, givers can actually build prestige.”

Page 137, “It’s the givers, by virtue of their interest in getting to know us, who ask us the questions that enable us to experience the joy of learning from ourselves. And by giving us the floor, givers are actually learning about us and from us, which helps them figure out how to sell us things we already value.”

Page 140, “By asking questions and getting to know their customers, givers build trust and gain knowledge about their customers’ needs. Over time, this makes them better and better at selling.”

Page 144, “Fragale (Alison Fragale, University of North Carolina professor) shows that when people have to work closely together, such as in teams and service relationships, powerless speech is actually more influential than powerful speech.”

Page 146, “When givers use powerless speech, they show us that they have our best interests at heart.”

Page 147, “The paradox comes from people thinking an inclusive leader isn’t strong enough to lead a team, when in fact that leader is stronger, because he engenders the support of the team.”- Batron Hill managing director and global head of marketing at Citi Transaction Services

Page 150, “New research shows that advice seeking is a surprisingly effective strategy for exercising influence when we lack authority.”

Page 151-“Advice seeking is a form of powerless communication that combines expressing vulnerability, asking questions, and talking tentatively. Research shows that people who regularly seek advice and help from knowledgeable colleagues are actually rated more favorably by supervisors than those who never seek advice and help.”

Pages 152-153, “Seeking advice is a subtle way to invite someone to make a commitment to us. When we ask people for advice, we grant them prestige, showing that we respect and admire their insights and expertise. Since most people are matchers, they tend to respond favorably and feel motivated to support us in return.”

Page 153, “Regardless of their reciprocity styles, people love to be asked for advice. When persuading and negotiating, givers speak tentatively and seek advice because they truly value the ideas and viewpoints of others.”

Page 165, “Givers don’t burn out when they devote too much time and energy to giving. They burn out when they’re working with people in need but are unable to help effectively.”

Page 166, “In research with two colleagues, I’ve discovered that the perception of impact serves as a buffer against stress, enabling employees to avoid burnout and maintain their motivation and performance.”

Page 168, “When people know how their work makes a difference, they feel energized to contribute more.”

Page 177, “When they’re on the brink of burnout, otherish givers seek help, which enables them to marshal the advice, assistance, and resources necessary to maintain their motivation and energy. Three decades of research show that receiving support from colleagues is a robust anti-dote to burnout.”

Page 178, “Otherish givers build up a support network that they can access for help when they need it.”

Page 179, “Over time, giving may build willpower like weight lifting builds muscles.”

Page 182, “Surprising as it seems, people who give more go on to earn more.”

Page 183, “It seems that giving adds meaning to our lives, distracts us from our own problems, and helps us feel valued by others.”

Page 190, “Trust is one reason that givers are susceptible to the doormat effect: they tend to see the best in everyone, so they operate on the mistaken assumption that everyone is trustworthy.”

Page 193, “The ability to recognize agreeable takers as fakers is what protects givers against being exploited.”

Page 198, “Once successful givers see the value of sincerity screening and begin to spot agreeable takers as potential fakers, they protect themselves by adjusting their behavior accordingly. It’s wise to start out as a giver, since research shows that trust is hard to build but easy to destroy. But once a counterpart is clearly acting like a taker, it makes sense for givers to flex their reciprocity styles and shift to a matching strategy…”

Page 199, “Being otherish means that givers keep their own interests in the rearview mirror, taking care to trust but verify. When dealing with takers, shifting into matcher mode is a self-protective strategy. But one out of every three times, it may be wise to shift back into giver mode, granting so-called takers the opportunity to redeem themselves.”

Page 206, “And Vanderbilt professors Bruce Barry and Ray Friedman found that in short-term, single issue negotiations, givers do worse than takers, because they’re willing to give larger slices of the pie to their counterparts. But this disadvantage disappears entirely when the givers set high goals and stick to them- which is easier for givers to do when advocating for someone else.”

Page 238, “People often take because they don’t realize that they’re deviating from the norm. In these situations, showing them the norm is often enough to motivate them to give-especially if they have matcher instincts.”

Page 258, “This is what I find most magnetic about successful givers: they get to the top without cutting others down, finding ways of expanding the pie that benefit themselves and the people around them.”

Useful Websites to Explore


http://www.humaxnetworks.com/default.asp (Check out the Reciprocity Ring)














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